Sunday, February 20, 2005

Ego Boost

Wanna feel good about yourself? I mean, do you want to feel like the best mommy and the best wife in the whole world? Wanna be at peace with your housekeeping skills and your own morals and beliefs?

It's really SO EASY. First, watch one episode of Supernanny. Next, watch one episode of Wifeswap. Might work better if you Tivo or record them and watch them back to back, although I've found that watching them on separate nights of the week works just fine. Oh, and an occasional Dr. Phil can give you a laugh and a boost as well.

Where do they find these people? I must be so average and so incredibly normal. I always see a bit of my thinking and ways in the more conservative family and then a bit of the same in the liberal family as well. Makes me right in the middle I'd say.

Mostly, these two shows make me so sad. They keep showing parents who have their children as accessories to their lives. Not as necessities and certainly not priorities. Parents that are never home or if they are home pay no attention to these little people.

And these parents who don't discipline their children ... in any way ... not even in a bad way! I guarantee you my two year old would be tied up in his room before he'd hit me or scream at me ... more than once. (Don't take me so literally ... no bondage around here.)

My jaw drops open when a parent complains about their kids watching too much television or "demanding" a different meal from the rest of the family. Are you kidding me? Our T.V. would be at the curb before my children watching it ran rampant. And demands? My four year old has never "demanded" I do anything. Gee, what would I do? I certainly wouldn't agree to comply!!

I'm young in my motherhood, just recently being blessed with a second little one. I don't claim to be all knowing when it comes to raising kids, but GIVE ME A BREAK. These aren't the difficult issues. I fear for teen years but I'm really hoping the smooth sailing now will evolve into a less than tumultuous young adulthood.

These most precious lives and souls are in our hands. Don't take it for granted, not even for a second.

We're all imperfect and striving to do better I'd say. If we weren't, what would God do all day? He'd be out of a job. I know for certain He's still working on me. - Lesa

"It is at our mother's knee that we acquire our noblest and truest and highest ideals." - Mark Twain

"The decision to have a child is to accept that your heart will forever walk about outside of your body." - Katherine Hadley

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Birthday of My Motherhood

For Sweet Trini Love ... in her favorite color of purple!

There was a magazine article I stumbled across a few years back, before I became a mother. The woman talked of how each time her oldest child celebrated a birthday she had her own celebration. She celebrated the beginning of her motherhood. That made such an impression on me.

Today as my oldest child celebrated 4 years of life, I too took time to celebrate and reflect on the miracle of loving and growing children.

As she told me how smart and "intelliget" her friend Julia is, I was so proud these words were in her vocabulary. She recognizes all of her ABC's and can count to 20 most of the time. She knows every word to The Little Mermaid II by Heart. She is eager for learning time every day. She is my daughter and she is amazing.

As she snuggled up next to me for our cuddle time before bed, I couldn't help but be incredibly thankful that this little person loves me and values our time together. I cherish the days that she still wants to curl up in my lap and be swaddled by the warmth of my arms for I know these days will pass all too soon.

She changed my life. She was the first thing in my life I couldn't quit. I have never once regretted or resented becoming a mother. I came across a song a few months ago, just after her little brother arrived. I had never heard it before but it was love at first listen. I can't hear it without tearing up and I can't sing it without crying. It goes something like this:

"In my daughter's eyes, I am a hero
I am strong and wise and I know no fear
But the truth is plain to see, she was sent to rescue me
I see who I want to be, in my daughter's eyes.

In my daughter's eyes, everyone is equal
Darkness turns to light, and the world is at peace
This miracle God gave to me, gives me strength when I am weak
I find reason to believe, in my daughter's eyes.

And when she wraps her hand around my finger
Oh it puts a smile in my heart
Everything becomes a little clearer
I realize what life is all about
It's hanging on when you're heart has had enough
It's giving more when you feel like giving up
I've seen the light, it's in my daughter's eyes.

In my daughter's eyes, I can see the future
A reflection of who I am and what will be
And though she'll grow and someday leave
And maybe raise a family
When I'm gone I hope you'll see how happy she made me
For I'll be there, in my daughter's eyes."

The day I heard this song, Will had been crying all day long. As a mother it's not even a job or a duty or even our responsibility to "hang on when we've had enough" or to "give more when we feel like giving up". It just is. This just equals motherhood.

I am so blessed to be among the mothers who've gone before me. The women who've known the pleasure that children bring; the women who've hung on and given more. I thank God for teaching me how to be this kind of human being. He's given me the perseverance that only a mother knows.

I still have my weaknesses but through my children I grow and change and hopefully become a little bit better of a human being every day. It's the best way I can think of to grow. Thank goodness He's still working on me through my precious little angels. - Lesa

"Never did God show such love as when He placed you in my arms and said,
'Woman, behold thy daughter.' "
- Author Unknown