Friday, December 31, 2004

C.B.C.L. Anonymous

C.B.C.L. Anonymous ... the new support group I'm starting. I don't know, maybe it's more like a social club. Chocolate Bliss Cookie Lovers Anonymous is what it is!

That's right. My name is Lesa and I'm a chocolate bliss cookie addict. Chocoholic. Blissoholic. Cookieholic. I'm hooked!

Okay Deana Nall ... I'm outing you too. Deana was my original "dealer". (Although I'm not sure if she is a user as well.) She brought a batch to my Christmas party this year. I had sweet, blissful dreams that night.

I was so concerned! I wondered how many parties I would have to throw so she could bring more? I wondered if it would seem odd to call her up to see if she had any just sitting around? (In other words I wanted to know if she had a "stash"?) I thought I could offer to pay her for them. We could even meet somewhere to make the swap; or is it a drop? A parking lot perhaps or maybe a dark alley.

Thankfully I quickly learned the tricks of her trade. I found the recipe and actually had success in creating my own. I have my own "cookie house" where I can be the dealer now. I can search for poor, unsuspecting closet addicts and reel 'em in hook, line, and sinker.

Funny how sinister you can make something with BLISS in the title sound!

On a more serious note though I've really been proud of myself in spite of this new found "crush". I've been applying Weigh Down Workshop principles to my eating for a few weeks now and God is really working on me. (Even with C.B.C.'s in the house.)

I did have a funny moment earlier this evening though. I was heading for bed and realized I had not put up today's freshly baked "inventory". (That's cookies.) I started placing them in storage containers (no, not baggies) and got a little chocolate on my finger.

Now, I had already resigned myself to no more food tonight until I felt hunger pangs. I was still full from dinner and didn't require any more food. Well, have you ever seen "Finding Nemo"? Are you familiar with the scene where the shark gets a little whiff of blood and goes bezerk?

When I tasted that chocolate from the quick little swipe I gave my finger I swear I felt like that shark! I mean that whole scene immediately came to mind. I stuffed those cookies in those tubs and I bolted from the kitchen with great resolve to "stay clean and sober". Oh, but it was tough.

I'm trying hard to seek comfort in my Heavenly Father. Sometimes I forget what an incredible comforter He is. I've been so sick this week and I have really wanted to turn to food but I'm finally putting all the pieces together with a little help from above. Food is not the answer ... even if it does take the form of C.B.C.'s.

I started reading, "The Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren yesterday. It was the "perfect gift" from my little sister Kara this Christmas. In two days it has already started to turn my thinking around and I think that's so cool! I'm hard-headed and stubborn so it's a bit more like a miracle!

So I'll take it one day at a time, one cookie at a time if I have too. A transformation now will only bring healing and heaps of blessings. I know He's cheering for me. I don't know if I had looked at it that way before today. He's a cheerleader too. That's kind of cool.

And I'll have to "journal my journey" through this book here on my blog. I think I'm in for quite a ride. Luckily I know the driver or I'm at least getting to know Him. He makes pit stops when needed and even handles most of the maintenance. He'll keep the engine tuned and purring and I'll trust Him to take care of it all. After all, He's still working on me! - Lesa

"Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to McDonald's makes you a hamburger."
- Author Unknown

1 comment:

Deana Nall said...

Wow -- I didn't know I possessed so much power. If you visit the Baker's Chocolate Web site, you'll find a variation with peanut butter. Hey, if you're going to develop an addiction, might as well go all the way!

I'm not completely clear on how the Weigh Down thing works, but you have to wait for genuine hunger, right? Well, couldn't you just wait till your stomach growls and then just put away a whole batch? Or did they ruin it by saying you have to stop when you're full. That's the way to take the fun out of eating.

Speaking of eating -- sorry I didn't email you back. Now that the holidays are over, our schedule is freed up somewhat. Tuesdays and Thursdays are probably the best nights. Just let me know!